so i did it.....

*sorry if I sound dramatic*
Last night, I did the worst thing I've ever had to do in my life. I drew a line in the sand, and told her that neither of us could cross that line. She's the one person I never ever wanted out of my life, and I told her this before. that she could stay. that she had to stay, even as friends. But I learned the hard way that I could no longer withstand the fucking torment I went through being at home alone without her. I had to grow a sack and do what needed to be done. I felt like turning back every step of the way, and eating every word that came out of my mouth. I hate seeing her in tears, I hate being in tears. But it's about self preservation. I'm sick and this is what I need to do to get better. It's growing up and it sucks.
So this is goodbye.
I love you.